Helping People Change: Coaching with Compassion for Lifelong Learning and Growth

Youre trying to helpbut is it working?Helping others is a good thing. Often, as a leader, manager, doctor, teacher, or coach, its central to your job. But even the most wellintentioned efforts to help others can be undermined by a simple truth: We almost always focus on trying to fix people, correcting problems or filling the gaps between where they are and where we think they should be. Unfortunately, this doesnt work well, if at all, to inspire sustained learning or positive change.Theres a better way. In this powerful, practical book, emotional intelligence expert Richard Boyatzis and Weatherhead School of Management colleagues Melvin Smith and Ellen Van Oosten present a clear and hopeful message. The way to help someone learn and change, they say, cannot be focused primarily on fixing problems, but instead must connect to that persons positive vision of themselves or an inspiring dream or goal theyve long held. This is what great coaches dothey know that people draw energy from their visions and dreams, and that same energy sustains their efforts to change, even through difficult times. In contrast, problemcentered approaches trigger physiological responses that make a person defensive and less open to new ideas.The authors use rich and moving reallife stories, as well as decades of original research, to show how this distinctively positive mode of coachingwhat they call coaching with compassionopens people up to thinking creatively and helps them to learn and grow in meaningful and sustainable ways.Filled with probing questions and exercises that encourage selfreflection, Helping People Change will forever alter the way all of us think about and practice what we do when we try to help.